How YOU Should You Be? – Part II, Multiple Personalities?

Back in May, I asked the question “How YOU should you be” in business.

And most of the responses I got agreed that you should just be yourself and let the chips fall where they may. I’ve also been reading some posts about this (Example), and they seem to concur: just be yourself.

But I’m not convinced it’s that simple. To me, it seems we need to develop multiple personalities – facets of ourselves, if you will – so that we can display parts of what is truly US, and yet keep other things hidden.

The best example I can give is a personal one. I have a somewhat childlike approach to life. I try very hard to retain a sense of innocent curiosity and display my interests as plainly as a child. But in business situations, this can be perceived as a lack of experience and viewed poorly. I need to click off this aspect and click on my ability to be focused on solutions (I’m a puzzle solver – which is still something gained from childhood, but can be applied to adult/business situations). This gives me the personality I need to garner the respect necessary to form partnerships.

If I let my guard down too soon and display my full, youthful demeanor too early in a relationship – before the other person has seen enough of my capabilities to understand that this part of my personality is a benefit – it can create in their minds doubt, which will sour the whole deal. And there are even some people who will NEVER be able to see it as a benefit, regardless of how well we’ve worked together in the past, because of their own interpersonal communication needs.

If we don’t create alternate displays of our personality, we run the risk of offending people, refusing to be in a relationship with them because of a personality conflict. Of course, by developing different facades, we run the risk of occasionally coming off as stiff or phony – say, for example, when you have to pull back on your personality in front of someone used to the looser you because the two of you are in front of someone who needs you to be more circumspect.

It really is a philosophical question, and I wonder what everyone thinks. Which route do you think is likely to be more beneficial – both in terms of generating viable partnerships and in terms of self-satisfaction? Please share your thoughts and stories.